Effective sentences tell
a story. They are built around characters and actions &emdash;
around people doing things. Readable sentences match the two essential
elements of a story, character and action, with the two essential
elements of a sentence, subject and verb.
* Express central characters as the subjects of verbs.
* Express their crucial actions not as nouns, but as verbs.
* Between those two, the first takes precedence.
a. Smith proved that Jones had failed to improve the property, but
the Court held that Jones had not breached their agreement.
b. Smith offered proof of Jones' failure in regard to improvement
of the property, but the Court issued a holding that Jones had not
committed any breach of their agreement.
c. Smith's proof of Jones' failure in improving the property resulted
in the Court's holding that there was no breach of the agreement
on the part of Jones.
d. The holding was that there was an absence of proof of a failure
in the improvement of the property and so there was no breach of